


I don't belong

by alllevelsrobin



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Connor Deserves Happiness, Crying, Deviant Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Jericrew is the best, Post-Pacifist Best Ending (Detroit: Become Human)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-26
Updated: 2018-12-26
Packaged: 2019-09-28 04:32:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17175965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alllevelsrobin/pseuds/alllevelsrobin
Summary: When they meet up with the other leaders around the fire, North says, “Our friend here just tried to escape the group because ‘he assumed that he isn’t welcome here anymore’. Would all of you care to assure him that he’s fucking wrong about that?” Connor stands behind her, feeling uneasy.“Why is that, Connor?” asks Markus. His heterochromatic eyes bore into his, and this time a bit more emotion is being shown than in the church. Worry? Uncertainty?





	I don't belong

“Where are you going?”

 

Connor stops in his tracks and slowly turns around to see the female deviant. Her name is North, if he remembers correctly.

 

“I-I assumed that I wasn’t welcome here anymore. My job is done, so I’ll leave you alone.” He continues walking. North catches up with him.  

 

Connor looks in her direction when she doesn’t immediately start talking. She’s frowning at him. Probably because she doesn’t like seeing him. She’ll probably be happier when he’s gone.

 

“What makes you think that?”

 

“What?” That catches him off guard. Does she mean that his job isn’t done yet? Or-

 

His thoughts are interrupted when North scoffs at him. “That you’re not welcome here? Markus says that you’re one of us, so that means you’re always welcome here.”

 

He freezes. Did no one see him point a gun at Markus on the stage? Why would they trust him? He used to be the deviant hunter, why would they want him to even be with the group? Did he read his relationship with Jericho wrong? It doesn’t seem logical for him to stay, the people obviously don’t like him, so it would be better if he leaves. Or not?

 

North sees him processing, his LED is blinking between blue and yellow. He’s very clueless as a deviant, isn’t he?

 

“Hey, hunter.” Connor blinks. He isn’t so sure if he likes that nickname. “Don’t mind the stares from the others, they’ll trust you eventually. You’re a part of the group, like it or not. If it weren’t for you, we’d all be dead now.” And then North goes back to the other leaders, but not before motioning him to come with her. He reluctantly follows.

 

When they meet up with the other leaders around the fire, North says, “Our friend here just tried to escape the group because ‘he assumed that he isn’t welcome here anymore’. Would all of you care to assure him that he’s fucking wrong about that?” Connor stands behind her, feeling uneasy.

 

“Why is that, Connor?” asks Markus. His heterochromatic eyes bore into his, and this time a bit more emotion is being shown than in the church. Worry? Uncertainty?

 

Connor clears his throat, “I… don’t know.” He takes a breath. “I don’t feel like I belong here, being the deviant hunter and all.” He hates how weak his voice sounds. It’s just like back in the church, heavy guilt weighing down on him. Markus’ eyes now show pity. Pity he doesn’t deserve.

 

“Well, we can’t have that, can we?” says the blond one, making Connor stop paying attention to Markus. He approaches Connor and puts an arm around his shoulders. “You’re one of us, got it? Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, ex-hunter or not.”

 

“I agree, you’ve done a lot for us from the moment you became deviant. I don’t see why we wouldn’t want you as a part of us.” says the dark-skinned one, who Connor recalls is named Josh.

 

They all turn to Markus expectantly. He meets Connor’s eyes with a warm smile. “You do realize that you have _risked your life_ for our cause, right? You infiltrated Cyberlife Tower, with a huge chance of dying. The only thing you should feel guilty about is the fact that you’re trying to leave us thinking that you don’t belong. You should be proud of what you’ve done.” He walks towards the brunette to lay a hand on his shoulder, a bit like he did back in the church. “I know I am.”

 

The emotions he’s feeling are overwhelming, but they don’t manage to override his guilt. These people are so kind to him when they shouldn’t be. They don’t know that he almost killed Markus. Again.

 

He needs to tell them.

 

“But… I almost killed you.” His voice sounds even weaker now. He hates it.

 

“You weren’t in control, Connor. I’ve forgiven you from the moment you started helping us. It’s fine.” Markus is clearly talking about when he had his gun pointed at him back in Jericho.

 

“No, I’m not talking about when we met. I’m talking about… just now. On the stage.” Markus’ smile disappears. No going back now.

 

“Amanda… I mean, Cyberlife took control of my program again. They trapped me in my own mind and made my body point a gun at you. I could only escape just in time to stop myself from shooting you right then and there. I-.” He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. “I get it if you don’t want to see me anymore, or if you want to kill me. I don’t deserve to live, I’m dangerous.”

 

It stays quiet for a long time. His internal clock says only ten seconds pass before something happens, but it feels like an eternity to him.

 

His eyes fly open when he feels arms around his neck. Another hand joins on his shoulder, and then another one. Only then he notices that he’s shaking and that his face feels wet. He returns the hug from the blond one and buries his face in his shoulder. A weird sound escapes his mouth. A sob. One of the hands leaves his shoulder to start rubbing his back.

 

“What did they do to you… They even managed to make you feel guilty after all you did for us.” Markus mumbles.

 

Connor is so confused.

 

“Why- why aren’t you mad? I’m dangerous to the cause-”

 

He’s interrupted by North. “As dangerous as a puppy, if that’s what you mean.”

 

That startles a laugh out of the rest. Connor doesn’t know if he should be offended or laugh with them. He decides on the last one.

 

When his crying finally starts to die down, he lets go of Simon. All of the leaders take a step back from him except for Markus, who stands right in front of him to put both of his hands on his shoulders and looks him in the eyes.

 

“Whatever Cyberlife has told you, you are not guilty of anything. It’s not your fault they took control of you again, it’s not your fault that I almost got shot again. All of us see that you are trying your best. You’ve fought for us from the very moment you became deviant, you’ve risked your life for us too many times to count. We’re thankful, so thankful that you’re here with us. But,” Markus’ tone changes from reassuring to sad, “it’s up to you to decide if you want to stay with us. It’s your life, you decide what to do with it. If you want to go somewhere else, that’s also fine. Just know that we would love to have you with us.”

 

Connor is speechless. He has to fight the tears from pouring from his eyes again before he says, “I want to stay with you.”

 

Markus lets go of him with a smile. “I’m very glad to hear that. And I’m sure the others are too.” He glances at the others to make sure he’s right. He is.

 

Connor feels like an enormous weight has dropped off his shoulders, his mind and body finally relax. A smile even manages to creep on his face. He looks at all of the other leaders.  “Thank you so much for forgiving me. I don’t feel like I deserve this, but… I guess it just takes time. Logically speaking all of you are right. I’ll try to do as much for the cause as I can.”

 

“That’s the spirit,” says North with a reassuring smile before turning to the rest, “Now, let’s see what we should do next. We need to find another place to stay, the church isn’t big enough for all those androids you brought with you.” She nudges Connor.

 

They continue talking around the fire, making plans for the future. The longer they talk, the more Connor’s doubts fade away. They compliment Connor for the ideas he contributes, then share some laughs when they’re done planning. This must be what friendship feels like, Connor thinks. He almost feels stupid for thinking that they would want him dead.

 

He won’t leave them anytime soon.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are always appreciated! I might even do a part two of this if someone asks ;)


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